Interesting that you posted this today. I had a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day on Saturday. Nothing major, just lots of little things. As I was telling this to my parents last night, I suddently felt the urge to downplay what happened and then followed up with, "Well, could've been worse." Yes, of course it could have been worse. I felt really stupid for complaining. I did manage to eke out a decent weekend. My family of origin did not tolerate negative feelings. To this day, I have a difficult time recognizing my own, naming them and then sitting with them. This is the weekend I decided to forgo my usual shot of vodka at night and it scared me a bit I felt kinda lost without it. Codependency and substance use/abuse are often seen together. Just an few interesting thoughts for me. You're right, it's never a competition.
It's a hard thing, rewiring our childhood trauma. My family wasn't big on acknowledging feelings. Unless they belonged to my mother. Ah, trauma. *hugs* for your continued growth and understanding why you do what you do. *hugs*
Interesting that you posted this today. I had a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day on Saturday. Nothing major, just lots of little things. As I was telling this to my parents last night, I suddently felt the urge to downplay what happened and then followed up with, "Well, could've been worse." Yes, of course it could have been worse. I felt really stupid for complaining. I did manage to eke out a decent weekend. My family of origin did not tolerate negative feelings. To this day, I have a difficult time recognizing my own, naming them and then sitting with them. This is the weekend I decided to forgo my usual shot of vodka at night and it scared me a bit I felt kinda lost without it. Codependency and substance use/abuse are often seen together. Just an few interesting thoughts for me. You're right, it's never a competition.
It's a hard thing, rewiring our childhood trauma. My family wasn't big on acknowledging feelings. Unless they belonged to my mother. Ah, trauma. *hugs* for your continued growth and understanding why you do what you do. *hugs*
This is so good to remember. I have a problem always downsizing my hard/bad days because were always just to suck it up.
Glad I could help!