Pick One: Hard-Wired Echoes
Motivational Sprites for October 24, 2024
Sometimes it’s hard to shake the echoes of our past, even harder to see the progress we’ve made, which can make finding a point to our existence harder still.
Today I chose these three motivational sprites to share with you. Pick one to read more:
Not a Burden
Yes, I am.
I can almost hear those words fall out of your mouth, as easily and in the same breath as they fall out of mine. But are we? More importantly, are you?
The simple answer is no, you aren’t. Complicated? Sure. But a burden? No.
I get why you’d argue with me, but fam, like imposter syndrome, people who are actually burdens don’t feel like burdens at all. They feel entitled to doing nothing (or conversely whatever they want to do), making unrealistic demands of their friends and family.
Listening to you, I hear someone who wants to do the things, but medical or mental health reasons or situational/environmental issues are standing in your way. And you tend to use any ounce of energy to do something to try and contribute to your family, your situation, your life. Often to your detriment.
Burdensome people do not care.
So repeat after me:
I am not a burden. I am doing my best, given the circumstances I’ve been dealt. Anyone who says otherwise doesn’t know my life, and if their criticism isn’t accompanied by assistance or understanding, their words do not deserve to be absorbed. I am not a burden.
Love,
Your Mom
Raising the Bar
You aren’t the same person you were last year.
I know that looking around your life, it might not feel that way, but that’s because the big picture is too vast. It’s really easy to overlook the little steps forward you’ve made over the course of your life.
This is doubly difficult when you can’t see how you’ve raised the bar with each part of your journey. Every step pushed it up a little. Sure, it slipped a little now and then (and let’s be honest, sometimes that slip is a landslide), but you’re still progressing, evolving, adapting.
And that counts!
Every single step forward.
Doesn’t mean you can’t mourn what used to be. Just remember that you aren’t a stagnant person unless you outright stop. Don’t do that. Keep going.
And know that you’re not alone. If you need an encouraging word or a listening ear, our community is here to help.
You’ve got this, kiddo.
Love,
Your Mom
Real Family
You know that saying, “Blood is thicker than water”. You’ve probably heard people say this more specifically about family, especially if you’ve gone low-to-no contact with abusive or neglectful parents. Despite the fact that it’s used constantly to discourage you from breaking those ties, the actual quote reads:
“The blood of the covenant is thicker than the water of the womb.”
This means that the relationships you choose are stronger than the ones you were born into.
But here’s the important part:
Too often when we’ve grown up in unsupportive or abusive households, we are left scrambling for threads. The closest ones look familiar but oftentimes they are just shadows of our abusers. And how are you supposed to know how to choose better if no one ever taught or modeled how?
It isn’t easy, no lie, but here are a few things to remember:
When you choose out of fear, you’re going to reaffirm the false belief that you do not deserve better. And you deserve love and respect.
Make peace with being alone. It gives you a platform for creating and enforcing better boundaries.
Surround yourself with people who want to be there with you, not those who want something from you.
You can do this.
Love,
Your Mom
Until next time!