Good morning, fam! Sorry I’ve been away. Life’s been, well, life.
Inspired by the amazing Emmarie Hodge on Medium, I thought it would be nice to translate my 3-a-day postings from my socials into a longer format. She does it with tarot cards, which I find very interesting and relevant, but I will be using my motivational sprites.
Pick the one that calls to you for a special message:
Worthy of Love & Respect
I know what it feels like to believe you don’t deserve good things. After all, you’ve been told (and shown) that you are worthless, a burden, and the reason people treat you badly. But those are lies embedded into our brains by miserable people who let their own shortcomings affect how they treated you.
Remember that: All those things are lies.
And how do I know that?
Because, kiddo, you woke up worthy of love and respect. It was that easy.
Their insistence otherwise is a reflection of personal trauma they’re not dealing with. Not you.
It’s their misery and inability to acknowledge that misery. Not you.
I know it’s hard sometimes to remember that, but I hope you hear my voice when you hear theirs.
I believe you.
I see you.
And I love you just as you are.
Love,
Your Mom
Grief is a Personal Journey
Grief is a complicated thing. You know how there are so many layers in your relationships with your people, family or friends? There are equally as many in the process of grief.
But oftentimes, other people will tell you that it’s time. Time to move on. Time to be over it. Time to pull yourself out of the grief.
However, grief is a personal journey. And only you can decide when you will not be in the depths of it. Especially since grief can be triggered weeks or years later, and you can feel like you’re back at day one. But I will tell you that part of the process is self-awareness, so you don’t drown in it.
For some people, that’s finding a path that will honor the person who passed. For others, it’s throwing yourself into a physical activity to push through it. And for others, especially when it’s a heartfelt death of a complicated relationship, it’s getting into therapy to finally unpack the complex trauma involved.
At the end of the day, getting it out instead of keeping it in is the goal.
You’ve got this, even when it feels like the cha-cha.
You’ve got this, even when people make you feel like you’re ‘taking too long’.
And if you need a shoulder to let it out, I’m here for you.
Love,
Your Mom
Choose Quality Over Quantity
Your circle doesn’t have to be big.
Your circle doesn’t have to be big.
What does this mean? In a nutshell, it’s about picking quality over quantity when it comes to the people you keep around you.
When I was growing up, I felt like there was something wrong with me, because I could count my real friends on one hand. Not school friends or acquaintances, but actually the people I could trust, who I felt knew the real me.
In my 30s, I realized that the problem wasn’t me, but the societal expectations drilled into my brain from movies and TV. Once I got over that, I embraced my small circle and thrived. No competition. No concerns that my secrets would be a commodity. Just people who loved me, who I loved in return.
So, if you’re finding yourself struggling with the size of your circle, remember that the people you hold closest to your heart should be the same people holding you closest to theirs.
Why?
Because you’re worth it.
Love this new Tuesday and Thursday format, consider sharing it with your friends and family! And don’t forget, starting next week, Monday, Wednesday, and Fridays will be my normal content coming to your inbox!